Monday, 4 August 2008

Dalton Trebeck Obit (Personal Note)

The late Dalton Trebeck had many co-stars in his many on-screen yarns. Yet throughout the years, before his unfortunate demise, none more thrilled the heartbeat of the true fan than these names;

Gabriel Van Dyke - Retired.

Dirk Michael Wheatley - Shot In The Face.

Jared James- Independent Spirit Award, 1996.

Mr Van Dyke, the daintily tubby sidekick, (who knew a fat man could juggle), bringer of mirth, star of those delightful, short-lived spin-off shows, (such as Supertank and Spacemen Hunts New Planets (a macho homage to Space 1999, the two-year later spin-off to Spaceman Hunts!!)). He found lasting cinematic affection, playing many lovable, loyal CIA sidekicks for Mr Trebeck, always playing a man who always seemed to know Mr Trebeck from childhood, which many a soft-hearted fan wish were true. Who can forget him telling the wheelchair afflicted Mr Trebeck that his entire family was butchered by a vicious lesbian cult dressed as Easter Bunnies in Deduce You Swine, nor the sublime chainsaw rescue of his family from corporate scum and crazy child-monsters in I Spite Your Father, Sir. (Bulgarian location is said to be suspiciously similar to modern CCA headquarters.)
Mr Van Dyke has entered private life, now runs a series of successful restaurants.

Mr Wheatley, a colossus of self-funded Buddha tours, where he would rant then scream at his audience, a man who could transform any villain to be a threat to the director (more than once has he threatened castration). A man who once yelled drink my piss live at the Oscars (Best Adapted Screenplay, 1997, when he was seen to be a promising talent). A man who let cocaine- afflicted bulls loose on a certain independent film event. A man who ruined his brother's wedding by hiring geriatric strippers. A man whose last film was called Shot In The Face, a killer midget event that has unfortunate story parallels to Mr Trebeck's I Spite Your Father, Sir. This is a man who has been said to have faked his own death. A man who played many sublime villains for Mr Trebeck, the volcanic chemistry and trust leading to many a violent showdown. What a man.
(Note. I am starting my own fansite for the late Mr Wheatley, with a special emphasis on his nature films, especially the sublime Mr Peru)

Mr James, star of many a mainstream indie film of budgets less than twenty-five grand (in his later years at least). Starting a career playing sexually-active or molested priests and intelligent yet doomed man-boys (Indie Spirit Award 1996- A Rope For All Men), his career fell away in a wave of ill-starred indie films that extended his range to playing lawyers badly, and dull side-kick roles to sexually repressed leading men who hugged him a lot. Forever being called boy, never truly a man, his roles with Mr Trebeck, starting when Mr Trebeck was a star, moving to direct to DVD, always had sublime comedy and emotional undertone, as they fought through many a Bulgarian hell-hole. A two- year peak (2003-2004) finished with a falling out with Mr Trebeck. They never spoke again, Mr James moving to low-budget parts, ranging from aging male prostitutes to young farmers saving their farms in Canada, all played by with ridiculous hair implant that obscured his face. Just be a man and go bald. Let's be fair, he was never as good as he was in Mr Trebeck's films. The late Mr Wheatley, and his contempt for Mr James. in print and in films, gave this young cineaste many a delighted smirk.

Throughout the next few weeks, this modest little blogspot site will replay some of the cinematic delights that Mr Trebeck and his comrades gave to us. We will start oh so very soon with the pulp masterpiece Tomorrow I Renege.

Dalton Trebeck (1952-2008)
Cause of Death- Cutting off facial skin with a machete before gutting own throat with butcher knife, in own Hollywood mansion, directly in front of wife of many years. (On a personal note, I don't think Mr Hemingway would have had the guts to go out like this. What a man.)

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